Dear Ethan,
It’s only hours to go now until you turn 9! All those years ago, still in the midst of (an epic) labour and growing more tired by the second I felt like we’d never get to the birth let alone through all these birthdays! And yet here we are 9 years later, surviving, ready to celebrate, winning at life together!
Over the years the labour, the teething, the continuous feeding,the sleepless nights, the growing pains, have all but dwindled to a distant memory. We have left that close, fuzzy, exhausting era of development, (where we would just try to make it through each day) and are now onto excitement, planning, deep conversations and (mostly) sleeping through!! What an incredible journey! I find it amazing that we’ve got so far!
As a first child, your birthdays always evoke such cherished memories, for it was you my son that started my life as a Mummy. You were the one to teach me how to love with the deepest parts of my heart and soul. You were the one that taught me patience and hope. You gave me strength when I thought I had none left. Your siblings are incredibly lucky to have you be the eldest. You have paved the way for them both and taught all of us how each age works, how to listen to our instincts and how to hold on when the road is bumpy. It has been an incredible lesson being your Mummy.
As (an almost) nine year old you have really grown up this year. You stand so close to the independent young man you will become, but still hold on to the innocence of your younger years. I love that you can still lose yourself in play: in Lego, role play, adventures, etc yet still role your eyes at your siblings when they do something ‘childish’. I love that you dance with abandon and laugh along with us when we are being crazy, even when I’m being “so embarrassing”! I love that you still want me to play with you, scoot outdoors, race you around the garden, etc- a little key into your world and the way you work. You are a very deep soul.
You are still one of the kindest, most generous hearted people I know and even in the midst of growing up and pushing the boundaries I see how caring you are with your sister, how you notice those being left out and include them, how you stand up for your brother when it counts and how thoughtful you can be in your words and actions. You put so much effort into the things you do and really try hard when meeting an obstacle (after some encouragement). You have so many wonderful layers to your spirit and I feel very blessed to witness them all as you grow.
This year you have accomplished so much yet again. Not just through your hobbies- sailing through the swimming awards, becoming a seconder at Cubs, completing most of the children’s section at the local libraries (I think they will run out soon 😂), but within your self too. After another move you were able to settle much quicker than before. You adjusted to a new school year with confidence and are beginning to trust that whatever life throws at you, you are able to get through it. I think you even surprised yourself at how brave you are (when you needed 6 stitches after falling out a tree) this year and how much you can achieve when you set your mind to it. I’m so proud of you.
I do hope you know how precious you are to this family. I know as the eldest you are often required to do more than the others, have more expected of you or get more of my negativity as we navigate this whole parenting journey. It can feel unfair and biased and I really wish it didn’t. I wish I could already have the answers and know how to deal with certain situations so that you too got the ‘best bits’, but as we learn together I hope you will always feel loved and cared for (even when I get it wrong) for my heart was designed to love you and you will always be incredibly precious to me.
I am really looking forward to your birthday tomorrow and spending more time celebrating you! I look forward to the year ahead and all the adventures we will share together. I hope you enjoy all we have planned for your special day and the sweetie cake you asked for!
All my love, my biggest one,
Mummy Xx
playathomemummy 